Happiness: A Guide to Developing Life's Most Important Skill Paperback – January 5, 2007

I am having a different expereince that those reviewers who wished that this book would provide more guidance. I'm 43 pages in, which according to the little Kindle bar at the bottom, is roughly 1/6th of the book. But I felt compelled to let people know that I'm finding LOTS of guidance.I've had the good fortune to cycle many times in and out of depression, with 2-3 days of depression, then 2-3 days of depression, over and over again. It became apparent that my depression was not driven by changes in the external world, or as much as what I did. My gift was getting to see that cognitive distortions fueled my unhappiness. I decided that I'm going to get happy.So, I drank in deeply page 19's statement that, "By happiness I mean here a deep sense of flourishing that arises from an exceptionally healthy mind." I want to improve the health of my mind, and see this as absolutely key. Dr. David Burns says this. Byron Katie says this. Eckhart Tolle say this. And Matthieu Ricar..So, when he advocates meditation so that we can quiet and better see our own mind, and goes into great detail about happiness, I'm also taking note. That is my work. He is guiding me. I'm hearing him say, "Practice meditation to better understand your mind." I'm hearing him say, "I'll give you lots of tidbits where people get led astray, so that if you notice any of these things in your mind, you'll see where you have opportunities to employ mindful awareness, care and practice, with a the idea that slowly you will move into more happiness."So, for example, I have been confusing pleasure and happiness, or at least been unclear as to what their relationship is. He carefully defines his terms, such as, "happiness," "pleasure," and "joy." This allows me to better follow what he attempts to communicate.And I appreciate his background. For me his deep understanding of science builds credibility. And his amazing youth speaks to me. I've been blessed in my life, yet found myself with a deep disasatisfaction that I haven't understood. So for him to leave the "blessed" life to live in what most Westerners call poverty and hang out with those who are actually experiencing and radiating almost mythical happiness, I want to know what he's learned. And I currently expect, based on reading that what he conveys in this book will be guiding me for some time to come.

I am a Christian but I loved this book. My perception was that he was explaining where some ideas he mentions are coming from but he was not pushing Buddhism. I took it more as psychology and how our ego (which is really non-existent bc it's only a thought in your mind) ((which isnt the mind also ephemeral? There's no "hard copy" existence of a mind!)) takes over thus producing anger (if we are feeling threatened, fearful, insecure), envious (vs happy) for the other, prideful, agitated, etc. If we truly want to be happy and at peace within, we need to ask ourselves : is this thought/feeling life-giving or life-draining? Most "suffering" thoughts (he calls them toxic) are life-draining, right? So, "letting go" of these life-draining thoughts (replacing them with life-giving thoughts) thru meditation and practice, is the way to true peace and happiness.(For a more thorough explanation and how-to on meditation, also order his "Why Meditate?" 2010).As an example, for me, one thing that really makes me mad, upset, pissed off, about my DH is that he is almost always late for everything!I get the pets settled, the house closed up, me ready and then have to wait and wait and wait. It's VERY embarrassing to me when others arewaiting for us... I feel this is a very disrespectful way to be. Keeping people waiting when you have been given the time (clock time) to leave/meet. This happened while I was reading this book, and I took one of the exercises on anger to heart and practiced it.... It worked...I found that, yes he was being disrespectful to me and the others but that it was my mind, my SELF, my ego that was producing the anger within me. I could choose to let my thoughts control me and drain me, or I could choose to let go of my insecurity of how others think of his insensitivity themselves (bc it was not MY fault we were late) and therefore only think life-giving thoughts (being with our friends). I felt SO much better, then!This is a biggie for me. And like the author states, it takes practice practice practice to come to inner peace and happiness. (Obviously I have a ways to go on this bc I did ask myself: does he CHOOSE to be rude and make ppl wait on purpose? No. And do the others get peeved about waiting for him? Maybe, but that again is on them and their "practice" and journey thru this life.)I can't recommend this book highly enough!